Tue 29th September

Queens Park Rangers - darlings, each and every one of them – well all apart from their v-sign spouting fuckwit keeper, Steve ‘I won it’ Slade and Completecock. No away wins in over a year, until tonight that is. And where did that run end? Where else but the Golden Graveyard!

The wulfs defending resembled the opening titles to the Banana Splits as they donate two early goals to the make all Walsall fans laugh fund. They then then play like arses for eighty minutes and Muggy gets plenty of stick at the end. I can sense a parting of the ways here which, whilst being very funny, would be somewhat unfortunate given the job he’s doing.

Albion get hammered 3 - 0 at Oxford with an abysmal display but Supermart (aka O’Connor) fires the winner for the Blues at Pompey.

In Europe, the Vile turn over the poorest side I have ever seen at this level with their charmless record transfer purchase bagging a hat-trick. He apparently gave Johnsen a particularly painful night with his strength and power. This news worried me for a while, so it was a huge relief when I realised the reporter was referring to his marker for the fixture Erland (ex Chelsea) and not Ulrika.